Hello Medium. I had the chance to think a lot in these last 2 months and I decided to share my resolutions with you all beutiful guys. I had a glorious period since September, I had my first strike on SuperRare, never happened before, and I was starting to let me go on my head too much, and I started to neglect my work a little bit. It can happen, I’m human, not a robot, not a E-learning machine that respond to cold program stimulus and I can make mistakes; mistakes that I swear will never happen again.
I began to wake up always more late in the morning, wasting time on social medias, more than I usually do, losing myself in less important things, neglect my creativity; it is normal I thought, artists always have a period where they are less productive and where they lose themselves searching for new inspirations for their next jobs. More immaginations more cool works to be done. In my case it was not so: I started to get lazy.
I began to feel myself tired, without energies, as a vampire sucks my blood every night and in few time I realized that there was something wrong in me. I did not know what it was, I blamed the money, I blamed the food and many other things not to see the truth: I was passing through a period of depression. Honestly a period that is still knocking to my door and I do all is in my strenght to not listen it.
Often we think that closing ears is enough to pretend that monsters are not outside. ..
Sometimes monsters are already cracked the door and they sit next to you and you put a bandage on your eyes. That’s my case. This situation, that it is not grave fortunately for me, is working as a brake to my normal artist life and I had to find a way out to react in time before this giant wave could swallow me. I’m not seeing a therapist, I decided to face this current setback myself using my own will and by giving me more rules to respect.
It is hard but progressively it is working on, and slightly I’m turning to be myself. In these last week I imposed myself to create a work per day and I did so in order to come out from this crisis step by step without overload myself too much or the risk could be a total nervous collapse. I took my time, there was no rush, I sit on my chair, opened my laptop, grab my wacom pencil and started to do something; it did not care what would be coming out, my goal was to shove my body and my mind to move; react.
reactions, reactions, reactions. . .
It was good, at the end I also composed something that generated a new collection.
The experience I’m living taught me that in your pathlife you have never to get crumbled, you can fall on your knees, but you can always get up until you have your legs undamaged. You have always to try to react and try to go on by seeing a different vision of things over the horizon even though it is difficult and frustrating. I tried to share my experience not to give a one more life lesson, there are too many in my opinion out there that do that, I only wanted to take you part of a “friend” chronicle, that you can hear every day told by a your relative.
Hope you got until here, and treasured about what you read, that it could be helpful for you and loved people you take care.
